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I'm ALIVE!
1 min read
Yep, guess who survived her senior year of high school!
Okay, so it wasn't THAT bad. But hey, with Advanced English and Advanced Chemistry, it is an accomplishment.
I also have big news. I am moving! And my family is coming with me! See, my dad works in Des Moines, so my family is moving there. I also happen to be going to school there, at Drake. I've already got my key chain...I'm set. It's a private school, fairly small, so I'll be able to find my way around. I am going to miss a lot of people in Omaha, though.
I will miss you, Anwe. Your smile brightens my day whenever I see it.
Well, I have to go; I would like to get some writing done before Kara Johnson's B-day party. See y'all!
Okay, so it wasn't THAT bad. But hey, with Advanced English and Advanced Chemistry, it is an accomplishment.
I also have big news. I am moving! And my family is coming with me! See, my dad works in Des Moines, so my family is moving there. I also happen to be going to school there, at Drake. I've already got my key chain...I'm set. It's a private school, fairly small, so I'll be able to find my way around. I am going to miss a lot of people in Omaha, though.
I will miss you, Anwe. Your smile brightens my day whenever I see it.
Well, I have to go; I would like to get some writing done before Kara Johnson's B-day party. See y'all!
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Heartbroken
1 min read
Dear Friends,
Yes. I told him how I felt, in a letter, and he told me that he could not return my affections. As an effect, five poems have been written in the last week, all to do with my angel.
I'll love him even if he doesn't return my affections. I will, of course, respect his feelings. But in my heart, I can still love him.
I wish things were different. Maybe if I was thin, it would be.
I've been crying some, naturally. Lost my appetite today, too, which is how I know my heart is truly broken.
He did say we can still be friends. He is such a gentleman. The way he handled this makes me even more fond of him. He said he felt bad seeing me cry.
I felt bad crying myself! (Little sardonic humor...)
But, since just seeing him makes me happy, I'll settle for that.
Johannes Backmann, my heart is yours, whether you like it or not...
Yes. I told him how I felt, in a letter, and he told me that he could not return my affections. As an effect, five poems have been written in the last week, all to do with my angel.
I'll love him even if he doesn't return my affections. I will, of course, respect his feelings. But in my heart, I can still love him.
I wish things were different. Maybe if I was thin, it would be.
I've been crying some, naturally. Lost my appetite today, too, which is how I know my heart is truly broken.
He did say we can still be friends. He is such a gentleman. The way he handled this makes me even more fond of him. He said he felt bad seeing me cry.
I felt bad crying myself! (Little sardonic humor...)
But, since just seeing him makes me happy, I'll settle for that.
Johannes Backmann, my heart is yours, whether you like it or not...
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Love Sick
2 min read
It's funny how things work out. I thought for sure that I was an impenatrable fortress; that no man, more specifically nothing with XY, could ever penetrate my barrier. But now...now a new face has entered into my life. A face that haunts my dreams, burning the image of those fierce blue eyes into my soul. Those eyes that gaze at me, yet see me not. Those beautiful, beautiful eyes...
I never thought it could happen to me. I spend most of my time avoiding the guys at my high school, becuase they are mostly heathens. But one of them has pierced my sheild of ice. One has the courage to look me in the face and smile. Oh, how I wish I could tell him how I felt. I nearly did today. He might have heard. I don't know. All I know is that he walked up and started talking to me, and I felt like DIE KONIGIN AUF DEM WELT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (the queen of the world)
I can't stop thinking about him. I don't know why I can't stop. It's so hard. I'm not used to this. I don't know where to begin. So I suppose now I'll go upstairs and dream of him, holding me in his arms and whispering sweet nothings in my ear...
Love,
I never thought it could happen to me. I spend most of my time avoiding the guys at my high school, becuase they are mostly heathens. But one of them has pierced my sheild of ice. One has the courage to look me in the face and smile. Oh, how I wish I could tell him how I felt. I nearly did today. He might have heard. I don't know. All I know is that he walked up and started talking to me, and I felt like DIE KONIGIN AUF DEM WELT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (the queen of the world)
I can't stop thinking about him. I don't know why I can't stop. It's so hard. I'm not used to this. I don't know where to begin. So I suppose now I'll go upstairs and dream of him, holding me in his arms and whispering sweet nothings in my ear...
Love,
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ALERT! SERIOUS GIRL STUFF ENCLOSED!
4 min read
Okay, so I have been friends with 
for a over three years now. I thought we were close. Almost sisters. Why else would I write an entire poem just for her?! Anyways, a few days back, I went to her page and saw that she had put my icon on one of her journals. She didn't put it under "family," where the rest of the people she hung out with were. It was under "people who remember me". Do you think I have the right to be upset, if I tried to get into that little "circle of friends" for the longest time, and if I thought we were closer than that?
Yes no and a reason, that's all I ask to those who think I worth a penny.
Oh!
And I wrote this note to Alex, finally deciding I couldn't keep my feelings under the rug anymore.
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Dear Alex,
Okay, first off, Anwe told me to be frank with you about something you did that hurt my feelings. I've kept it inside long enough; it's time to lay the cards on the table.
Ever since we met, I felt like we were close. You were always there for me, and I was always there for you. You always gave me strength, and I always had a good joke for you. But that whole time, there was a black mist surrounding our relationship, apparently only one that I could see.
I really tried to be a part of the group that you, Anwe, Rae, Tranq, and Priestess formed. I really did. But, even though you guys never said anything to me, I figured out that you really didn't want any new faces in your group. I tried to get in, tried to be part of it all, resorted to changing me to try to get you guys to accept me into your circle. I drew pictures of you guys to try to show that I wanted to be friends. I wrote poems! But nothing. I was locked out.
I wrote a poem called THE OUTSIDER, trying to tell you guys how I felt.
But what really hurt is when you put that they were all your "family" and I wasn't. That just plain stabbed me. Was it Rae who held you while you were crying over not finishing the physics final? Was it Anwe who listened to you complain about your mother, then assure you everything would be all right? Was it Priestess who always tried to have a smile for you? Apparently.
I never forgot the time you helped me feel better in Physics. I still remember it, as I am sitting here typing this. You are a sweet girl, Alex. A talented writer. A wonderful person. And yet, you can be a monster if you want you. It doesn't take much effort, now, does it? To hurt someone deeply? You probably didn't mean to hurt me. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt.
As to your request to use me for a character (I doubt you still will want to have anything to do with me after the above, but still), I don't mind. If that's the only way you and the others will accept me. To erase my flaws and carve me in tree pulp.
I used to call you Dragon-lady and Genius. I hope all is well. I suppose we are still friends, even if my heart is broken. So yes, I wish the best for you. I did recieve your card from Anwe. She's the only one who still looks at me when I say hello. Rae and Tranq pretend I don't exist. I know they will all be mad once you tell them what I said; oh well. I was never a social butterfly to begin with.
I am in AP English with Sandoz, and she and I don't get along so well. Or, I don't feel we do. I can't speak for her. It's looking like I will be going to Drake. I hope you guys don't have to move again.
Signed,
Ashley
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D'you think I was too harsh? Becuase that's how I felt. Like someone had stabbed me right through the heart.
for a over three years now. I thought we were close. Almost sisters. Why else would I write an entire poem just for her?! Anyways, a few days back, I went to her page and saw that she had put my icon on one of her journals. She didn't put it under "family," where the rest of the people she hung out with were. It was under "people who remember me". Do you think I have the right to be upset, if I tried to get into that little "circle of friends" for the longest time, and if I thought we were closer than that?Yes no and a reason, that's all I ask to those who think I worth a penny.
Oh!
And I wrote this note to Alex, finally deciding I couldn't keep my feelings under the rug anymore.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Alex,
Okay, first off, Anwe told me to be frank with you about something you did that hurt my feelings. I've kept it inside long enough; it's time to lay the cards on the table.
Ever since we met, I felt like we were close. You were always there for me, and I was always there for you. You always gave me strength, and I always had a good joke for you. But that whole time, there was a black mist surrounding our relationship, apparently only one that I could see.
I really tried to be a part of the group that you, Anwe, Rae, Tranq, and Priestess formed. I really did. But, even though you guys never said anything to me, I figured out that you really didn't want any new faces in your group. I tried to get in, tried to be part of it all, resorted to changing me to try to get you guys to accept me into your circle. I drew pictures of you guys to try to show that I wanted to be friends. I wrote poems! But nothing. I was locked out.
I wrote a poem called THE OUTSIDER, trying to tell you guys how I felt.
But what really hurt is when you put that they were all your "family" and I wasn't. That just plain stabbed me. Was it Rae who held you while you were crying over not finishing the physics final? Was it Anwe who listened to you complain about your mother, then assure you everything would be all right? Was it Priestess who always tried to have a smile for you? Apparently.
I never forgot the time you helped me feel better in Physics. I still remember it, as I am sitting here typing this. You are a sweet girl, Alex. A talented writer. A wonderful person. And yet, you can be a monster if you want you. It doesn't take much effort, now, does it? To hurt someone deeply? You probably didn't mean to hurt me. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt.
As to your request to use me for a character (I doubt you still will want to have anything to do with me after the above, but still), I don't mind. If that's the only way you and the others will accept me. To erase my flaws and carve me in tree pulp.
I used to call you Dragon-lady and Genius. I hope all is well. I suppose we are still friends, even if my heart is broken. So yes, I wish the best for you. I did recieve your card from Anwe. She's the only one who still looks at me when I say hello. Rae and Tranq pretend I don't exist. I know they will all be mad once you tell them what I said; oh well. I was never a social butterfly to begin with.
I am in AP English with Sandoz, and she and I don't get along so well. Or, I don't feel we do. I can't speak for her. It's looking like I will be going to Drake. I hope you guys don't have to move again.
Signed,
Ashley
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D'you think I was too harsh? Becuase that's how I felt. Like someone had stabbed me right through the heart.
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GERAHHH!
3 min read
Hey All!
Yeah, I'm alive. I'll be posting something later, but I just have to rant about something right now.
I am a frequenter of Elfwood tours. I usually stop at the new tours and take a look at what's up daily. Guess what I found this morning?
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Elfwood guided tour:
Everybody Has The Right to Love
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Latest update: 11-06-04 Replaced a few more pictures that mysteriously dissappeared...
First and foremost: America sucks. I cannot even comprehend the fact that 11 states believe so freaking strongly that some people just don't deserve rights. And we all know, of course, that the president is going to appoint judges that support these laws. Personally, I say we (and by we, I mean anyone that supports the GLBT cause, whether you are GLBT yourself or an ally) boycott marriage.
Secondly: I've done some thinking, and my tour is no longer about angrily ranting at bigoted people. This tour is now officially dedicated to anyone who has trouble being accepted for who they are. Look through these beautiful pictures and see just how many people DO open their minds and accept people's differences, and be happy!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Usually, when I see stuff like this, it doesn't bother me. But in the wake of the tsunami, I just had to tell her, Miss Johanna Holmlund, what I thought of that little comment. I told her that if she doesn't like it here, she can just GET OUT! People would literally die to have what Americans have!
I mean, we can walk down the street without fear of being shot at or encircled by a gang and raped many times while onlookers laugh and point. We can express our opinions without fear of the government killing our families! WE HAVE FREE PRESS!
Johanna, you need some serious attitude adjustment! Why don't you go live in Columbia? Or even better, Rwanda, where rape gangs run rampant? WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?!
RR. Okay, I'm done. It just makes me mad when people are ungrateful. I get up every day and thank Lord Jesus for every breath. He's probably shaking his head at my outburst up there in Heaven. But I had to say something or I was going to die!!!
I hope the rest of you have a nice day and be THANKFUL for everything you have!!!!
Love,
Ash
Yeah, I'm alive. I'll be posting something later, but I just have to rant about something right now.
I am a frequenter of Elfwood tours. I usually stop at the new tours and take a look at what's up daily. Guess what I found this morning?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Elfwood guided tour:
Everybody Has The Right to Love
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Latest update: 11-06-04 Replaced a few more pictures that mysteriously dissappeared...
First and foremost: America sucks. I cannot even comprehend the fact that 11 states believe so freaking strongly that some people just don't deserve rights. And we all know, of course, that the president is going to appoint judges that support these laws. Personally, I say we (and by we, I mean anyone that supports the GLBT cause, whether you are GLBT yourself or an ally) boycott marriage.
Secondly: I've done some thinking, and my tour is no longer about angrily ranting at bigoted people. This tour is now officially dedicated to anyone who has trouble being accepted for who they are. Look through these beautiful pictures and see just how many people DO open their minds and accept people's differences, and be happy!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Usually, when I see stuff like this, it doesn't bother me. But in the wake of the tsunami, I just had to tell her, Miss Johanna Holmlund, what I thought of that little comment. I told her that if she doesn't like it here, she can just GET OUT! People would literally die to have what Americans have!
I mean, we can walk down the street without fear of being shot at or encircled by a gang and raped many times while onlookers laugh and point. We can express our opinions without fear of the government killing our families! WE HAVE FREE PRESS!
Johanna, you need some serious attitude adjustment! Why don't you go live in Columbia? Or even better, Rwanda, where rape gangs run rampant? WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?!
RR. Okay, I'm done. It just makes me mad when people are ungrateful. I get up every day and thank Lord Jesus for every breath. He's probably shaking his head at my outburst up there in Heaven. But I had to say something or I was going to die!!!
I hope the rest of you have a nice day and be THANKFUL for everything you have!!!!
Love,
Ash
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